My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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