Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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