just come out here and I will go home with you...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize