I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
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