next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
