It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
