The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
