U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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