he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
