Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize
