I could have mohawked her pubes.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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