there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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