Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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