Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
