Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize