Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Randomize
