you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
