im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize