life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
