Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Can you bring me the toilet please
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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