it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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