Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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