we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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