I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
