I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
