i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
