yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
