The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
A bitchslap is in order.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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