he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
