i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
