What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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