seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
