I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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