bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
