Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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