VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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