What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
