he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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