Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
