i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Randomize
