He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
you are never too drunk for berry picking
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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