whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
