i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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