i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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