Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I could make wine with my vomit
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
