she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm too high and old for this...
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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