she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
