i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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