Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
last night I used snow as a chaser
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
