I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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